Some one asked me what’s the one thing in life that I always wanted and could never get. I had many answers to that question but I didn’t say much just hemmed and hahed and shrugged my shoulders like I didn’t know. I knew and it wasn’t the typical answer like money or love or happiness. Those things can be very important to a person but for me it different: the one thing I wanted was something that I can never a chance to turn back time. I want to go back to a time when I eighteen. I was afraid of a lot of things even though I was too prideful to admit. Being a military brat never being stable knowing  within six months to a year I was leaving and being forced to start all over again. I wish then that I could have admitted it. If I could do anything I will tell myself to go with my gut feeling because the first emotion is usually the correct one. I would tell myself that I should have made the decision to transfer colleges when I wasn’t happy there and was constantly told that I was too “different”  to ever fit in. I will tell myself then to set goals and stick to them and don’t let anyone deter you from you goals. Not one soul:  Not the people that pretend to be your friends and secretly talk about you. Not your “peers” that feel because of the color your skin that you don’t belong in the same place as them and remind you every second of it. Don’t doubt yourself or your abilities you can do you everything that you put your mind to. I would go back in time and tell if myself those things but time travel hasn’t been invented yet as far a know.  So all I can do is tell my present self those things.


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